What women want

Dating success is all about giving your partner a little bit of what they want. That might sound overly simplistic or arrogant to some, but the truth is, if you are not what a person is looking for, then you are unlikely to be successful on your date.

While everyone is different, and people will be looking for different things from a date, there are underlying themes that are pretty much universal.

For example, turning up late, making inappropriate jokes, or looking scruffy are all big no-nos, and can prevent you from getting a second date.

Therefore, it is important to get the basics right. Of course, the first date can be a nerve-racking experience, but with our tips below, you are more likely to be successful in being exactly what women want.

So what do women want?

Attention

Come on, who does not like attention? But here, what we really mean is that very few women appreciate having to share your attention with the cute waitress that walks past the table, a football score, your mobile phone, or the scenery outside the window.

Nobody likes to compete on a first date, and if a woman feels like she's just not that important to you, then you will most certainly not be that important to her.

Consider it another way. How would you feel if she was drooling over every guy in the room, or barely listened to a word you say during the date?

Make her the focus of your attention, and you are much more likely to get off on a good footing.

Chivalry

Regardless of what some feminists say, simple acts of chivalry are not dead. Allowing the door to slam in her face, refusing to share your umbrella with her if it is raining, and being kind and respectful to staff members who serve you food and drinks, are pretty much essential if you want to create a good first impression.

Good conversation

The key word here is conversation. No lady likes to be subjected to a monologue about why you are fantastic and she's lucky to be with you, nor does she appreciate talking to someone to who for all intents and purposes may as well be a brick wall.

As a guy, you have got to know how to talk the good talk. Be responsive, listen thoughtfully, don't talk over her, don't dominate the conversation or belittle her, and respect each other's others opinions and you are likely to go a long way.

But having a decent conversation also means having to something to talk about. If all she is able to get from you are yes and no answers, then she will probably lose interest.

Sincerity

There is nothing worse than a man who plays game or does not call when he says he is going to.

While you may both have busy lives, women tend to get excited when a guy they really like tells them they are going to call.

But then that guy very quickly becomes Enemy Number One if his promise to call turns out to be little more than just hot air.

Be honest and upfront about your feelings, as you will be much more respected for that.

Express interest without being creepy

You know that whole 'keep 'em mean, treat 'em keen philosophy?'

It doesn't work. Treat 'em mean, and they will be keen…for someone else. So if you like the lady, for goodness sake, be a man and let her know, but without sounding like a stalker, or using cliches. 

Pay for the first date

Just do it. You can argue the toss about equality later, but coming across as tight on the first date won't do you any favours.

For the first date, 'going dutch' is a fairly risky strategy, and besides, it doesn't have to cost you the earth. 

We're not talking about a three course meal at the Ritz here, even something as down-to-earth and simple as buying her a cup of coffee, going for a picnic in the park or taking her to a local museum will go a long, long way. As you can see by the examples above, there are plenty of affordable – and even free – date ideas that you can take charge of that still make you look like a total gentleman.